Nessie

What’s Nessie’s secret for surviving for centuries? Believe in yourself, even if no one else does.

I’m traveling through the highlands of Scotland, so it seems only fitting that our Fun with Cryptids highlights one of the most famous beasts out there: the Loch Ness Monster.

Of course, we’re all familiar with Nessie (and if not, where the hell have you been?). She’s a creature with a long neck and several humps, usually compared to an Elasmosaurus. With only a few blurry photos and sonar readings, there isn’t much evidence of Nessie’s existence. However, reports of her date back centuries, making it a bit tough to ignore all of them.

The first documented report of something lurking in Loch Ness appears in the text, Life of St. Colomba, from the 6th Century AD. The story claims that St. Colomba visited the area after a man was attacked by a “water beast.” When one of his followers ventured into the water, the creature charged him. After Colomba made the sign of the cross, the creature retreated.

Modern interest peaked in 1933 when George Spicer and his wife saw the creature cross the road (sounds like the start of a bad joke). They described it as “a most extraordinary form of animal” with a large body and a long, wavy, narrow neck. And they weren’t the only ones to see the Loch Ness Monster outside of its loch. In 1934, Arthur Grant nearly hit the creature on his motorcycle and managed to come up with a sketch of it for researchers.

We won’t waste time talking about the Surgeon’s Photograph since it was revealed to be a hoax long ago, doing nothing to help the case of Nessie. And it’s not the only faked photo to come out of the Loch Ness Monster mystery. The impressive George Edwards photo from 2011 is yet another addition to the hoaxes surrounding the loch.

In 2014, many people believed Apple Maps finally managed to catch the elusive beast. The image is eerie as you see what looks like a 50-foot long catfish lurking just beneath the surface. A giant catfish doesn’t really line up with the Nessie lore. But, you can’t deny that the image is impressive. After tinkering with the low-quality satellite image, people have found that it is the wake from a boat that is lost in the low resolution. This adds just one more blow to the argument against Nessie.

It seems as if the only proof we have of the Loch Ness Monster is eyewitness accounts. But despite the endless hoaxes and explainable photos, we cling to the mystery of her. In today’s day and age, we need a bit of strange and unusual, and Nessie is one of the few things giving it to us.

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